Fight the power with your home décor?
I had this post somewhat drafted earlier in the week but given everything that’s happened in Ukraine, I felt I should rewrite because this perspective could be helpful to any of us who are safe at home, but who feel nervous, fearful, and uncertain about the future. For this I’m going to do my best to communicate my ideas eloquently - please bear with me.
In times of threat, we look outside ourselves to find answers, reassurance, and protection. In many ways, this is completely natural and effective - there is safety in numbers after all. However, today a growing number of players take advantage of this natural tendency, and have collected followers, money, and votes by offering hollow solutions to our feelings of insecurity. We are all vulnerable to suggestion from others, but this susceptibility intensifies when we’re living in fear. When we take the bait, we give our power away to people who actually have no ability to provide us with the certainty, control, or protection we desire.
But we can build resiliency to the snake oil when we know, accept, and love who we are. And funnily enough, the level of your connection to yourself is on display in your home.
How susceptible are you to outside influence? How much of your personal power has been given away? To help answer that question, look at your décor and the overall style of your interior. What is the personality of your home, and does it match its inhabitants? What evidence of your hobbies and interests can be found? How much does your space match the vibe of some influencer’s grid, a Pottery Barn catalog, or an aisle at Hobby Lobby? Are you following trendy instructions or taking your own risks?
It can be hard to look at ourselves and our homes objectively, but even if you feel well connected to your space, I recommend this super cool (if I do say so myself) exercise to connect with your authentic identity through your décor:
Tour your home and pull out your all-time favorite items in your house. Throw pillows, blankets, candlesticks, lamps, frames, books, plants, mugs, vases, anything that could be on display in your home, but only your very favorites. Gather them all in one space in front of you. Whatever number of items you selected is fine, but try to keep it under ten.
Look at the pieces both together and individually, and list the thoughts and feelings that come up. Why do you like them? In as many groupings of one or more items, fill in the blanks to the statement: “This piece(s) is ________ and I like that because ________ is important to me.
If nothing comes up immediately, search for any commonalities or themes in the pieces and see if that triggers a feeling for you. Make as many statements as you can. It doesn’t have to be profound, it just needs to be true. Some examples:
These pieces remind me of specific events with friends and I like that because my relationships are important to me
These pieces are soft and fluffy and I like that because home life, comfort, and self-care are important to me.
These pieces are puzzling and interesting and I like that because expressing my unique self is important to me.
These pieces make me laugh and I like that because not taking life too seriously is important to me.
These pieces have blue glass, which reminds me of water, and I like that because my hobby of swimming is important to me.
These pieces remind me of different cultures and I like that because travel and expansive thinking is important to me.
This piece is a huge fig plant I grew myself and I like that because honoring my accomplishments is important to me.
Have your list of statements? Did you learn anything new about yourself? Perfect! You’ve already done so much to reconnect. Read through them again and pay special attention to what you identified as important to you. Narrow your list down to the 2-3 important things that excite you the most. This is your inspiration to center your authentic self in your space and in your life.
With your décor, find ways to expand upon and display cues to your important things. Is your heritage important to you? Go find your heirlooms and display them prominently in your home. Do some research online and search for pieces that align with your culture. Do you love to read? A nice bookshelf is a must, obviously, but you can do even more with that. Frame your favorite quote or a map of Middle Earth, find a painting that reminds you of your favorite character Little Women’s Beth playing piano, or get a throw pillow that is so Great Gatsby. Anything that excites you and brings you back to your important thing is exactly what should be featured in your home. Get started and have fun with it!
This is how you call back your power. Soon enough, your home will be filled with pieces that not only give you warm fuzzies, but also serve as reminders of who you are and what you value as an individual. Displayed prominently, you teach yourself to value these things in your space and in your life.
You are too wonderful a person to hide your true self to the world, let alone in your own home!
By connecting with, prioritizing, and expressing our authentic selves in our home, we can take that confidence and clarity with us out into the world and say, “no thanks, I know who I am, and that’s not me” to anyone and anything who tries to throw us off our game. More power to ya!
